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Tired Mom- needs feeding

tired.jpg I have definetely come down from vacation high, and I hit hard. I am so tired, I need a vacation from my vacation.

While sitting in church today, I realized I am burnt out. Let me give you my church leadership resume (believe me this is not to toot my own horn, I am not earning my way into heaven). I lead worship and a married couples small group. My hubby and I lead and teach marriage prep. I have recently been approached to be a table leader at MOPS next year. I told them no, unless they were desperate, because I seem to have a problem giving a firm no.

Anyway, I realized today that I am doing so much leading that I am not getting very fed which is leading to major burnout.  Soon I fear I will fall into the trap of doing a lot of “God stuff” without a lot of God. I will fully admit that I am smack dab in the middle of a yearly summer spiritual slide. I also think when you spend your days mainly around people who are under 4 feet tall it is nice to have a place for spiritual growth that you are not in charge of providing.

Anyone relate out there? I would love some words of wisdom.

Comments

  1. I think that this is a major problem in churches today. A few select people do EVERYTHING. My husband is on our local board, director of outreach, usher, and sometimes works the sound board. I on the other hand am a church slacker- I just show up for stuff and help when I can.
    As for words of wisdom- first off I would go to the MOPS leader and give her a firm no because you do need some time to yourself where you don’t have to plan or think. You might even try to find a weekly women’s Bible study that you can participate in, but not lead. My church is on the smaller side and we don’t currently have a women’s Bible study and I wanted one during the day so I looked for one in my area that has a study and provides childcare. I found one and I’ve been going for 3 1/2 years now and I love it. The great thing is everyone knows that it’s not my home church so expectations are low. I don’t mind bringing a meal to someone in the group who’s sick or just had a baby, but outside of that no one asks me to do anything.
    The good thing for you is that you realize that you’re on the verge of burnout and hopefully you’ll be able to rectify the situation before you actually do burn out. If all else fails have another kid- expectations really drop when you have 3 young ones :). Hope this helps.

  2. I think there are a lot of women your situation. I was there once, but thankfully the Lord taught me how to say “no” and my family has been much better off since!

    There was a time when I was the MOPS Coordinator, sang in the choir, taught preschool Sunday School, served in the women’s ministry, served on the preschool ministry board, was in women’s Bible study, involved in Sunday School and the list goes on and on. I was in the 20% of the church that does 80% of the work. And I did get burned out. When we moved last year and had to find a new church, I knew it was time for me to allow God to teach me how to say “no”. It was easy to get out of all my old obligations, because I was no longer attending that church, but I knew I would be right back in that same old situation if I didn’t allow the Lord to grow me. Here’s what I did…

    I prayed about the 3 most important areas in my life or the 3 most important places for me to serve (I did not include my family, since it’s a given I’m going to serve them!). And now I filter all my opportunities through those 3 areas. If it doesn’t line up, then I say no right off the bat. For example, the 3 areas of focus for me are my neighborhood, my church and the girls homeschool academy. Does that make sense. Find the 3 areas that you’re most passionate about and focus on those areas, letting the other things go. If it’s teaching, singing and Bible Study, then say “no” to anything that doesn’t fall into one of those catagories.

    You’re in a season right now raising young kids and I’ve found that often times as women we feel like we need to do more to feel productive or that we are contributing. But, your kids will get older and I promise you will have more time to serve when your not dealing with the day to day care of young children. Enjoy your kids right now and scale back on some of your other obligations.

    I know I’ve tyeped a lot here (good thing I type 70 wpm!), but I feel your pain! I’ve been there! I’ll be praying for you!

  3. I know how you feel. Right now I am serving by running the nursery for my church (kids 18 months to 3 years old) it is exhausting but I love the kids. I just wish that I was able to sit in on more lessons for adults and that my kids would be quiet during our sacrament meeting (sermon) so that I could get a little spiritual meal in. I also need to get my act together and read the scriptures more than I have been.

  4. I know what it’s like to get pulled in a thousand different directions, feeling unable to say no! It can really start to break your spirit. I think people start to view you as superwoman, thinking, “oh, she can do everything! And she must enjoy it!” Ugh. Hang in there and just try to wean off all the duties a little at a time (I know, easier said than done)! We’re here for you to vent to! :)

    Jane, P&B Girls

  5. I know what it’s like to get pulled in a thousand different directions, feeling unable to say no! It can really start to break your spirit. I think people start to view you as superwoman, thinking, “oh, she can do everything! And she must enjoy it!” Ugh. Hang in there and just try to wean off all the duties a little at a time (I know, easier said than done)! We’re here for you to vent to! :)

    Jane, P&B Girls

  6. I know what it’s like to get pulled in a thousand different directions, feeling unable to say no! It can really start to break your spirit. I think people start to view you as superwoman, thinking, “oh, she can do everything! And she must enjoy it!” Ugh. Hang in there and just try to wean off all the duties a little at a time (I know, easier said than done)! We’re here for you to vent to! :)

    Jane, P&B Girls

  7. I know what it’s like to get pulled in a thousand different directions, feeling unable to say no! It can really start to break your spirit. I think people start to view you as superwoman, thinking, “oh, she can do everything! And she must enjoy it!” Ugh. Hang in there and just try to wean off all the duties a little at a time (I know, easier said than done)! We’re here for you to vent to! :)

    Jane, P&B Girls

  8. I know what it’s like to get pulled in a thousand different directions, feeling unable to say no! It can really start to break your spirit. I think people start to view you as superwoman, thinking, “oh, she can do everything! And she must enjoy it!” Ugh. Hang in there and just try to wean off all the duties a little at a time (I know, easier said than done)! We’re here for you to vent to! :)

    Jane, P&B Girls

  9. I know what it’s like to get pulled in a thousand different directions, feeling unable to say no! It can really start to break your spirit. I think people start to view you as superwoman, thinking, “oh, she can do everything! And she must enjoy it!” Ugh. Hang in there and just try to wean off all the duties a little at a time (I know, easier said than done)! We’re here for you to vent to! :)

    Jane, P&B Girls

  10. I know what it’s like to get pulled in a thousand different directions, feeling unable to say no! It can really start to break your spirit. I think people start to view you as superwoman, thinking, “oh, she can do everything! And she must enjoy it!” Ugh. Hang in there and just try to wean off all the duties a little at a time (I know, easier said than done)! We’re here for you to vent to! :)

    Jane, P&B Girls

  11. I know what it’s like to get pulled in a thousand different directions, feeling unable to say no! It can really start to break your spirit. I think people start to view you as superwoman, thinking, “oh, she can do everything! And she must enjoy it!” Ugh. Hang in there and just try to wean off all the duties a little at a time (I know, easier said than done)! We’re here for you to vent to! :)

    Jane, P&B Girls

  12. I know what it’s like to get pulled in a thousand different directions, feeling unable to say no! It can really start to break your spirit. I think people start to view you as superwoman, thinking, “oh, she can do everything! And she must enjoy it!” Ugh. Hang in there and just try to wean off all the duties a little at a time (I know, easier said than done)! We’re here for you to vent to! :)

    Jane, P&B Girls

  13. I know what it’s like to get pulled in a thousand different directions, feeling unable to say no! It can really start to break your spirit. I think people start to view you as superwoman, thinking, “oh, she can do everything! And she must enjoy it!” Ugh. Hang in there and just try to wean off all the duties a little at a time (I know, easier said than done)! We’re here for you to vent to! :)

    Jane, P&B Girls

  14. I know what it’s like to get pulled in a thousand different directions, feeling unable to say no! It can really start to break your spirit. I think people start to view you as superwoman, thinking, “oh, she can do everything! And she must enjoy it!” Ugh. Hang in there and just try to wean off all the duties a little at a time (I know, easier said than done)! We’re here for you to vent to! :)

    Jane, P&B Girls

  15. I know what it’s like to get pulled in a thousand different directions, feeling unable to say no! It can really start to break your spirit. I think people start to view you as superwoman, thinking, “oh, she can do everything! And she must enjoy it!” Ugh. Hang in there and just try to wean off all the duties a little at a time (I know, easier said than done)! We’re here for you to vent to! :)

    Jane, P&B Girls

  16. I know what it’s like to get pulled in a thousand different directions, feeling unable to say no! It can really start to break your spirit. I think people start to view you as superwoman, thinking, “oh, she can do everything! And she must enjoy it!” Ugh. Hang in there and just try to wean off all the duties a little at a time (I know, easier said than done)! We’re here for you to vent to! :)

    Jane, P&B Girls

  17. I know what it’s like to get pulled in a thousand different directions, feeling unable to say no! It can really start to break your spirit. I think people start to view you as superwoman, thinking, “oh, she can do everything! And she must enjoy it!” Ugh. Hang in there and just try to wean off all the duties a little at a time (I know, easier said than done)! We’re here for you to vent to! :)

    Jane, P&B Girls

  18. I know what it’s like to get pulled in a thousand different directions, feeling unable to say no! It can really start to break your spirit. I think people start to view you as superwoman, thinking, “oh, she can do everything! And she must enjoy it!” Ugh. Hang in there and just try to wean off all the duties a little at a time (I know, easier said than done)! We’re here for you to vent to! :)

    Jane, P&B Girls

  19. I know what it’s like to get pulled in a thousand different directions, feeling unable to say no! It can really start to break your spirit. I think people start to view you as superwoman, thinking, “oh, she can do everything! And she must enjoy it!” Ugh. Hang in there and just try to wean off all the duties a little at a time (I know, easier said than done)! We’re here for you to vent to! :)

    Jane, P&B Girls

  20. Conversation with my husband on the way home from church yesterday:
    Me: There is NO WAY I am helping with Vacation Bible School. I DO NOT want to do that.
    Husband: Yeah, I am TOTALLY maxed out on church.

    (He is the youth leader and plays in the worship band. I help with youth also and am the church “aprty planner” and try to be a good Christian and NOT be bitter about all the extra time he spends at church away from our family!)

    So – I feel ya.

  21. Um, I meant “party planner” of course. I should go to bed.

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