The Birds and the Bees

image  Way back when Lily was little I read about/found/came across (seriously I can hardly remember my name some days) a series of Christian books that explained sex to kids. There are 5 books in the series and each one is age appropriate for varies age groups. I bought the first book, Why Boys & Girls Are Different , when she was around 3 and we read it together. It covers the basics about girl parts and boy parts and talks about how boys and girls though different can be anything they want. It talks about families and how every family looks a little different. All the information is weaved into a story and it is well done.

As an aside, we use real body part names in our family. I am not writing them because with my sex series I already get enough spam so I don’t want to add fuel to the fire. But let the record show, we call things by their proper names. For that reason at very young ages my children would proudly tell you all about their parts and if you happened to be a boy they would tell you all about yours. I couldn’t have been more proud at parties. Ahem.

Anywho, when I was pregnant with Silas we found a wonderful book for kids that breaks down the pregnancy by month and with pictures and illustrations tells children all about what is happening with their mom. The girls LOVED the book and always wanted to know what was happening and how big the baby was and how much longer until he was born. It was a fun way to share the pregnancy with them. But because I happen to have bright, inquisitive girls they learned a bit more than they had in the other book. Like discovering where exactly the baby comes out. Another fun fact they liked to share with friends and occasionally strangers. Lily’s question upon learning how things happened was, “Wow, does that hurt?” It was the perfect time to remind her just how much that hurts and that she should possibly be more obedient after all the pain I went through to bring her into this world. That little reminder just never gets old.

Well now that Lily is 7, she has “graduated” to the second book in the series,Where Do Babies Come From? . It is actually for kids 6-8, but seeing as Silas came smack dab in the middle of 6 I felt she was already getting more than enough education. But this past weekend I decided to pull out the new book. I don’t want to be naïve about what kids know and how early they know it and it is really, really important to us that, as much as possible, our kids get that info from us. But I was a little nervous because Lily is super inquisitive and asks a ton of questions and I didn’t want to get further into this subject than necessary. We had originally planned for the hubby and I to read the book with her together, but we wanted this to seem like a natural conversation (versus the parents sitting her down for “the talk”) so I went solo on this one. Plus, after he read through the book and I asked him what he thought, and he replied “It says scroctum.” and proceeded to laugh uncontrollably. 

So I shared it with her. This next level book covers different kinds of families, but this time touches on adoption. It covers how a baby grows and that it happens in the uterus. It covers boys and girls being different again, but this time talks about how because of how we are made only girls can be mommies and only boys can be daddies. And then comes the big stuff. The whole “when a mommy and daddy love each other very much…….” It basically says that they hug really close and their bodies fit together in a special way and the mom has an ovum and the man has a sperm. And then it goes into a bit more detail about the male and female anatomy.

It is all done really well in the form of a story over a few weeks of a little girl’s life when she asks her parents various questions. These questions occur at a party, while running errands, while at a museum, on a play date and even while making a floral wreath in her mom’s craft room. The whole time I am reading this book with Lily she keeps saying, “Mom I know all this already.” But I knew she didn’t know the sperm and egg thing and some of the details of anatomy. So I was a tiny bit freaked out about what questions would occur when I got done reading. I really don’t think she knew that there was a man remotely involved in this whole thing so I figured she would want to know exactly what part he played. I am reading and internally sweating.

So we get done and I say, “What do you think Lily? Do you have any questions? Was there anything new you learned?” She says no. Then she pauses and says “Wait.” And time stood still.

“What’s a wreath?”


  1. That is hysterical! We had to have the talk kind of early with both kids. When we moved into our house, we had a box of books that were my husband’s when he was a kid. Jake was in first grade, found the “Where Did I Come From” book and one night, out of the blue, said “Where exactly do the squirm come out of, mom?” I was like….wwwwwhaaaaatttt???? lol

    Bailey was unfortunately told more than she needed to know in kindergarten, so I had to do some explaining. No matter what, it’s uncomfortable, but we are very open and also call our stuff by the right name (even though Bay still calls it her “privates” and always has). I feel that the openness has made my relationship with my daughter that much closer- she’s in the beginning stages of puberty and she has no problem asking questions, etc. Frankly, I like that!
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  2. So funny about that last question!!! :) I agree though, it’s so important to talk to them earlier than you “think” they might know. I found out all kinds of things on the school bus. :(
    I’m going to bookmark that first book right now and think about ordering it after Christmas.

  3. My daughter is 2, and I got sweaty and nervous just reading this post. I found out everything from other kids, and I hated that! These subjects weren’t covered in our home. I want it different, but I don’t have any idea how to go about it. Oh, I’ll be calling you in a few years!

  4. Jill, this is probably one of the best blog posts I’ve read in a while! Totally refreshing and I’m glad you use the “real names” around your house. I can just picture your little girls blabbing on and on about their “girl parts” in public!

    I {literally} laughed out loud while reading — thanks!
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  5. Della says:

    We have that book for our girls, too. In fact, they were older (10 and 11) and it answered most of the questions they had at the time – luckily they’re not as inquisitive as yours! I really like that one.

    For that same age group (6-9 ish) there is also a great book called “The Wonderful Story of How You Were Born” which is what my mom used for us…. it is, unfortunately, out of print, but you can find it around (there are 16 of them for sale on Amazon, for example)

    When I was little, we used the proper words for boys, but used “front” for “girl parts”. It was no more confusing than saying “bottom” for the rear end, and it avoided a bit of embarrassment. I plan on doing that with mine too.

  6. nicolerenae says:

    I put this book on hold at the library! It’s probably time to have this conversation before they hear too much at school!

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