I feel like I need to tell you all that my kids are really awesome and that I do lay down the law quite a bit and that to many people I am probably really strict but I think that all just gets to the problem of our standard for what parenting looks like these days being really skewed. So I will refrain (even though they are, and I do, and I am…)
So instead I will tell you that we have been in “Unspoiling Bootcamp” around these parts lately. My kids are thrilled.
I have been taking much more note of behavior this week and noticing little bits of disrespect that have creped in. They are subtle but they are there. And they are being cracked down upon. I need to find the most effective punishments and stay even more consistent, but we are making progress.
One other thing I really REALLY learned from the comments is that I have been underestimating what my kids are capable of helping around the house. So lucky for them we have instituted a new chore system. Well it isn’t a system. I am the queen of chore systems and charts and routines that last for a few weeks at best and then die a quick death. I think my kids are onto me.
Instead the routine is simple. When we wake up in the morning each kid has a chore they must complete before anything fun can happen that day. As of now I am providing a lot of supervision and instruction with the chores because I want them to learn to do them right. But soon I will be backing off and letting them do things by themselves. Side benefit: I no longer have to clean my toilets or mop my kitchen floor, two tasks I hate more than a root canal. Score!
One thing that my kids do awesome is play by themselves and find their own fun. That started at birth when I left them to play on their own and I am so grateful for that because I have really been paying attention lately to how often I find my kids off somewhere with some elaborate invented game. My only role in that is too do a more consistent job of making sure they clean up after themselves. Again with the side benefit of less work for me.
I have already noticed some great changes, but I still have some goals and outcomes in mind. Mainly I want to cultivate a better attitude of gratefulness for all they have. But I also realize that starts with me and my attitude and far too often I am stuck in a place of discontentment (which is a whole other post that has been brewing in my brain). Sigh. My least favorite thing about parenting is how often it is a mirror back to all the things you need to do better yourself.
So net out: You all are awesome for your wisdom, my kids don’t necessarily thing so though, and my house has clean toilets. All in all not a bad week.
Have you done anything concrete after reflecting on the blog post or article?