I am so excited to introduce a new monthly guest post as part of the Marriage, Unwrapped series.The handsome Mr. Diaper Diaries will be posting monthly on the theme “What Your Husband Wants You To Know.” I am sure you will find him as brilliant as I do. I wish I would have known what he shares today when I first got married. But thankfully the hubby has been patient as I learned. I hope you can benefit from it too.
Men are dreamers. Well, at least most men are. We dream about moving to new cities, starting our own businesses, playing professional sports, becoming famous, or even quitting our jobs and becoming beach bums (with our wife and kids in tow)! Many wives don’t understand this. New wives tend to panic upon hearing crazy ideas, veteran wives tend to ignore them, and over time, husbands learn not to share these big ideas. But few wives recognize the need to nurture their husbands’ creativity or ambitions, or recognize that it’s possible to do so without risking the family’s stability or nest egg.
So here’s the scoop… as a wife, you are bound by ridiculous pressures and societal expectations. Keep the house looking good, don’t go crazy with the credit card, raise perfectly behaved children, and for heaven’s sake, don’t hang on to any of that baby weight. I know… ridiculous. And husbands have our own burdens… provide financially (for both needs and wants), be strong, fix everything, tackle two days of chores after a 45 hours of work, and for heaven’s sake, don’t let those chicken wings wreck your cholesterol level. The grinding nature of the work week and taxing responsibilities of life can challenge our spirits. We can respond by allowing our brains to run on auto-pilot, or we can use the imaginations that God gave us to fantasize about what’s possible. That escapist mentality can be used for all kinds of good and evil (think Prov 6:27-29), but it’s best put to use when we allow our ambitions to challenge us to exceed others’ expectations for us.
So the next time he comes up with a new invention or dreams of becoming a charter fisherman in the Florida Keys, ask him to tell you all about it. Smile, praise his ambitious spirit, and give him a kiss. If he makes an appointment with a banker or begins writing a letter of resignation, then intervene by pulling him aside, sharing your concerns, and ask him to put the family first. But in the meantime, be the person who appreciates his passions and the person with whom he dreams of escaping. That’s what my wife has become for me, and for that reason, she’ll be the first person I thank when I raise the Stanley Cup.