Family "Vacation"

minivan2 Who coined the term family vacation? I am pretty confident that it is the world’s biggest oxymoron. Cause let’s be honest. If the kids are all involved there is very little rest and relaxation.

It starts before you even leave. The house has to be clean (cause you don’t want to come home to a mess), laundry done (so that you actually have something to pack), and then the actual packing begins. In our house that looks like this: Dad throws a few t-shirts and a pair of shorts in the middle of a suitcase. Mom runs around frantically packing herself and all the children. But not just clothes. She packs clothes, diapers, bottles, snacks, car activities, sunscreen, swimsuits, medicine, and anything else she might need for the occasional, “Did we remember to pack the (insert miscellaneous item here)” question she gets from her husband or kids.

Then everyone piles in the minivan which is packed completely to capacity and heads out on their magical vacation. Before you reach the end of the driveway someone has already piped up from the back seat, “Are we there yet?”, “I’m hungry”, “I have to go potty”. Lather, rinse, repeat for the next few hours.

We finally reached our hotel and began to try and strategically figure out how and where everyone will sleep. We spring for a suite so at least we have two rooms of sleeping options, but even then chances are sleep will be marginal at best. My kids aren’t used to sharing a room much less a bed so there are a lot of “she’s touching me” and “your leg is on my side of the bed” being thrown about. Add in a baby who is teething and that whole “rest” thing isn’t much happening.

Pack a day full of WAY too much activity, WAY too much junk food. Way, way, WAY too much heat. Good golly heat wave. Heat and humidity makes everyone a bit more cranky than usual doesn’t it? Speaking of cranky, that darn aunt of mine who last appeared on my birthday, decided it would be even more fun to come a week early and crash my vacation. We are not on speaking terms anymore.

Then to wrap up vacation, we pile back into the minivan with all our stuff which seems to have bred like rabbits in the night. More “Are we there yet?”, “I’m hungry”, “I have to go potty”. A bit more of me banging my forehead against the window while contemplating pulling out the “If you don’t stop poking each other I am going to stop this car and come back there!!!” But it seemed rather cliché. So instead I fell asleep and let the hubby deal with it ;)

So now we are home. And the minivan appears to have thrown up in my living room. I need a vacation from my vacation. Can I get an amen?


  1. A-to the-Men!

  2. Amen, sista!

    This is exactly why I don’t go on “family vacations” unless it is for more than a week. It’s just not worth all the effort for me.
    Ashlie- Mommycosm recently posted…Mommycosms first video reviewMy Profile

  3. Amen sister. Thats how I’ll feel next month as we head to Michigan after spending 2 or 3 nights in Chicago!
    Olivia recently posted…Recent ProjectsMy Profile

  4. Amen & amen. We took the kids to Grand Haven beach on Saturday (only 45 min. in the car) and within the first five minutes they were asking when we would be there. I wish I could remove my ears when I ride with them.

    That rotten aunt of yours has horrible timing.
    Laurie recently posted…OrdinaryMy Profile

  5. Amen! That is why I’m not even sure I want to take a vacation this year–we can stay for free at my in-laws house in San Diego and see sights, go to the beach etc–but the 6 hour car ride–eek!
    Eos Mom recently posted…Linky Love-July 10My Profile

  6. Oh my. Family vacations. Or even a day trip! I have an entire Tahoe to empty courtesy of a one day trip that took 4+ hours to pack for! Yeesh. But the memories are priceless, right!?
    Amanda – VintageDutchGirl recently posted…Commenting and StalkingHello Out There-My Profile

  7. Word.

    This was me last week. Ex.Hau.Sted.
    Heather @ Not a DIY Life recently posted…Mamavation Week 28My Profile

  8. Unfortunately, the opposite is not really vacationing at all… which is mostly the way it goes in my fam. When we do go on vacations, it’s usually a shorter two to three day event – because much longer is crazy-making.

  9. Oh Amen and Amen! We just got back from a last minute one day trip to Oregon and yeah, that car spewing in the living room thing is totally true! Now I have 4 days to clean my house and pack for our 3 week vacation…
    The best part about our road trips is when it starts getting late (we got home at 12:30am last night) and I’m trying to stay away to talk to my hubby… and then I sort of drift off and start dreaming/hallucinating because I’m so exhausted and I say weird stuff in my sleep! I NEVER talk in my sleep, only when on car trips!
    Last night I woke up and caught myself mid-sentence when I was apparently trying to get my son to finish his meal (which is a common every day occurrence). Other times I have randomly talked about unwrapping presents and seeing a mama cow in a tree! Keeps my hubby awake waiting to see what I’ll say next!

  10. You took the words right outta my mouth.

    QuatroMama recently posted…Don’t Blink- Q-A with Jessica TurnerMy Profile

  11. AMEN!
    I can so relate!! We just got back two weeks ago from our beach vacation…so exhausting!! crazy schedules….challenging relationships with extended family…..I just kept reminding myself about the smiles on my kids’ faces and the wonderful memories they were creating.

  12. Been there, lived that. Excellent depiction of mom-eye’d view of vacay.

    But the kids love it, so that counts for something, right?
    Kendra aka The Meanest Momma recently posted…Alcova Heights ParkMy Profile

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